More Books for Kids!

Super cute little book. Bear cub wanders off chasing a bee and papa bear has to go find him. They run through an opera house. Excellent illustrations, kind of a Where's Waldo with bears.

So I actually never read the full title until I had it at my house, and I thought it was called "Unicorn Think's He's Pretty" and I thought it sounded mean and vapid and about beauty. It's not. It's an adorable little book about a goat who's jealous of a magical unicorn that moves into the neighborhood, only to find out that the unicorn is also jealous of him SPOILER ALERT they end up being friends.
Kind of like Enemy Pie, but for tinier children. Like 4-6 year-olds. Maybe? I don't have kids I don't know what's appropriate anymore!!!

Spoilers abound. Because this book is 12 pages long.
This book is wonderfully illustrated, and shows the relationship of a friendless schoolboy and a bluebird. No words, only pictures.
I'm kind of traumatized by the ending.
I would only make a child read this as punishment if he was an awful kid like Peter from Ender's Game and I wanted him to stop sacrificing animals in his backyard.

Things We Set On Fire (3) & The Color Purple (5 million stars)

TL;DR Don't even read this blog post, just go read The Color Purple.

I feel bad telling you guys about books I didn't like. Like, why am I wasting your time? And what if by reading this you don't read it but it actually would have been a book you really, really liked? I should just not tell you anything too special about it and say it's pretty good and then you can read it or not just like you were already planning on...

I got this for free from Amazon Prime, and at first I really liked it. But then I got distracted by something shiny and completely forgot I was reading it. And how much can you really say you liked a book if you literally forgot you were reading it? So here's why it's three stars. It's not a bad book, so it doesn't get 2 stars or a "I didn't even bother finishing it," it just felt a bit predictable after a certain point and so I didn't really feel the need to finish it.

I also, as previously mentioned, sometimes get really ADD and bored of a book that doesn't have a compelling love story, SO....I went off and re-read a love story I liked (or two) and then finished this book when I remembered it.

Anyway, the books about Vivvie and her estranged daughters. Estranged Daughter #1 (Kate) tries to commit suicide and her eldest daughter, Averlee, finds her unresponsive, slumped over the kitchen table and has to call the ambulance. So grandma gets the girls and Estranged Daughter #2 drives from Portland to Florida in about a day (um?) to help with the girls. And eventually we find out why Kate tried to kill herself and by then I'm bored. (Which is not to say suicide is boring but that this was not a compelling story about a person who is struggling with suicidal ideation)

Also the daughters acted about 3 years younger than their listed ages. I pictured them, based on their actions as the elder, Averlee, being between 7 & 10, but Quincy acted about 4 and at some point was mentioned turning 7. Averlee has to help Quincy buckle her seatbelt and tie her shoes and my 5-year-old cousin can do all of that no problem. Of course, my cousin is a genius and perfect in every way, but I might be biased.

I would love to hear from anyone who liked this book. I honestly didn't understand why the women all hated each other so freaking much. I mean, if Celie and Shug Avery can get along, why can't they?
You know what, actually, go read  The Color Purple if you're into fiction about women. If you have read that, then I guess you can read this book until you find something better. Get it from the library though. Don't pay $8 for it. Unless you're rich. In that case, go for it.

If you don't know about this book, you should. Don't let the first page scare you away. You should AT LEAST go watch the film, which was also amazing except I didn't watch it all in one sitting because it was way too depressing. You get to see Whoopi Goldberg do some outstanding acting, and Oprah wasn't bad either.

Did you know Oprah was in a movie?

 There is also a musical, that is also good. I have definitely belted out "African Homeland" in my car, by myself, so many times.

SPOILERS

HERE JUST WATCH IT - Wait, don't there's definitely a HUGE SPOILER unless you don't pay attention to any of the character's names. Out of context maybe its ok. 

Cress (5)

I'm so sorry. I talked and talked about how excited I was about this book, and then I never mentioned that I actually read it. I did. Within three days of it coming out.

This is the third book in The Lunar Chronicles series.

In true Jana fashion, I really don't know what I like so much about these books.

Ok, that's not true...I love YA love stories. Because they have that lovely Disney quality to them, where at the end they get together and everything is all happily ever after.

Grown-up novels always talk about that messy part where you like each other, you finally get together, and then after awhile your fantasy-boy starts to become a real person and you have to deal with each other. And then people break up and hurt each other and yell a lot. I'd rather they try to kill each other with their magic powers OBVIOUSLY.

Also, I am obsessed with Cinderella. I've done the play 3 times now. I've read every book that so much as mentions it might be about Cinderella. It's my thing. If it's yours too, read these books. If you liked Once Upon A Time, read these books. If you like Merlin, probably definitely read these books.

I don't LOVE this show, BUT I like it more than I should.

Also, UPDATE on my whole blogging situation. NO WONDER there was a month long hiatus. I wrote about 4 books per blog post for the last 3 posts!! What was I thinking?

I know what I was thinking. I was thinking I AM THE BOOK MASTER. I READ ALL THE BOOKS. Which is true (I mean, sort of) but here's how I read them: 4 at a time. 1 audiobook in car or while running, 1 on kindle at bedtime, & 1 physical book for when I'm not trying to sleep or at work, & then a play or nonfiction or whatever. (or all of the above) SO I don't finish anything for 3-4 weeks, and then I finished 3-5 books in one week. And then I hammer out a bunch of reviews and set them to go up one week apart. 

ALSO since I still haven't read Henry IV, I don't want to read plays and I need to because I desperately need some new monologues. I have read 14 books this year and there have only been 12 weeks of the year. I shouldn't have run out but I got cocky. 

Let this be a lesson: When feeling like a failure, look not on what you have NOT accomplished, look instead upon what you HAVE accomplished. - Every Successful Person Ever 

You welcome, world. All 25 of you that read my blog.

OMG IT'S LIKE I HAVE A CLASSROOM ALREADY. 

Books Are Boring OR They Make You Cry OR BOTH (jk not both)

Books are boring. No, seriously, some are. Except for sometimes when they aren't. But they're too depressing to read every day. Anyway, I totally understand how some people become non-readers. It's hard when you're reading a book and you just don't really care anymore. You don't want to be a quitter. You want to finish what you've started. Except you really don't. So just...you know...go find a different book and tell yourself you'll "come back" to that boring book and eventually you'll give it enough distance and read enough better books that it'll be ok you didn't finish that one book.

Remember when I started out this year going "I am going to post a blog post every week! I am the best at blogs and reading!" And then I did in January and almost did in February, and now it's been a month since I've posted anything. Well, I've been reading. And I've been writing. But I've been writing scripts for my budding actors. And reading scripts for monologues for audition season....and not finishing all of them because I hate reading plays. I like watching plays and being in plays, but I suck at reading plays. I always feel this need to sit down and read the whole thing in one setting and seriously, who has the time for that?

So here's my list of boring books that I've started and haven't finished. Go ahead and yell at me if they're your favorite. I had to wander off and re-read Ella Enchanted for like the 19th time to remind myself that I do like some books.

I would like this play a lot more if "my" character (Lady Percy) was in more than three pages. It starts to get really funny and oddly make more sense when you read it while drinking wine. Kind of like how I can speak French again when I drink. Maybe if I drank more wine I would like to read plays more. I'll let you know.
Kind of like Game of Thrones with less sex and strong female characters.
Status: Just need to finish Act V

Ugh. I remembered hating the third book, but then I realized I gave it five stars when I reviewed it, so I decided I might actually have secretly liked it.
I do not care about Robert Langdon anymore. I do not like that he always has a beautiful, smart female "assistant" every case, who he sleeps with and then we never see again. You are forty freaking years old, figure out how to have a relationship with another human being.
This book basically makes me want to re-read Dante's Inferno and/or write my own novel using Inferno as it's basis.
Status: Just over halfway before the library stole it off my kindle. Rude. Just kidding, now I don't have to finish it. Thanks, library!

I feel the same way about Philippa Gregory as I do about Glee. Out of four books/episodes, 1 is fantastic, 2 are meh, and 1 is ugh-freaking-noxious (like obnoxious but with more pain to the reader/viewer). I loved most of her Tudor series (The Other Boleyn Girl, The Virgin Queen, The Constant Princess, in that order. Fab.) But I feel like she drones on and on and this is like the third book she's written about the same series of events so I vaguely know what's going to happen and I liked the first queen better so I really just don't care about this character or what happens to her.
Status: I liked the first half. I'm stuck in the last quarter. I'll probably finish it. Except I started a new nonfiction book that's more interesting so maybe I'll just quit reading fiction.

AND FINALLY

a book I loved.

OH MY GOD THIS BOOK. I listened to it via Audible which was AMAZING but listening to it made everything ten times worse. This is one of those books that makes you feel good about yourself for having read it, because you clearly understand life and pain and the world better because you read it. Unless you don't like books like that, in which case, um, sorry? 80% of the books I love made me cry. If a book doesn't make me cry, I basically assume that it's a terrible book. Because I'm a monster.

No just kidding. Old Nick is a monster! (In case you care about what this book is about, this is the part where I tell you.) The novel is told from Jack's perspective. Jack has just turned five-years-old. Jack and his mom live in a room together.

(super minor spoiler alert)

No, literally. A ROOM. Room. Because Old Nick kidnapped his mom and has held her there for seven years, or all of Jack's life. Jack's mom hasn't really explained this to him yet, because she's a good mom and is trying to take care of her child. But you, the reader, figure it out pretty quick and are completely horrified. 

I drove to a party while listening to this book. And cried. So it took me a long time to get through it because I could only listen to it when I was driving home and it was ok to arrive sobbing, and the roommates would say "Oh, you're listening to that book again." To which I would nod and go get chocolate. 

HUGE SPOILER ALERT

THERE IS NO BIGGER FONT

BECAUSE BLOGGER IS FREE.

I'M WARNING YOU.

READ HALF THE BOOK AND THEN COME BACK, BECAUSE YOU'LL ALREADY HAVE READ THAT PART OF THE BOOK.

(SORRY SHANNON, who alerted me that the GIANT FONT was actually really small in the real post. PROOF READ PEOPLE. And by people, I mean me.)

About halfway through the book they escape. Which is the part I cried the hardest. And then Jack has to learn about the REAL world and he misses his home, which depresses his mother and everything is beautiful and nuts.

The voice actor who played Jack is my new favorite person. So nuanced. So adorable. Just want to hug Jack forever. 

Picture Books

I figure if I'm going to school for teaching, I should bring something to the table in September when I start student teaching - yikes!! So I started reading some books. If you happen to have little ones or little ones you can borrow and read to, here's some books:

Cute book, loved the illustrations. I turned it into a reader's theatre script for my Acting Basics class (ages 8+) and also used it to introduce the idea of monologues and auditions. My 13-year-old was not impressed, but the 8-10s loved it.

Probably could make a good introduction to an art activity where they need to fill the whole page with color or use color in a creative way.

"Laszlo is afraid of the dark. The dark is not afraid of Laszlo. 

Laszlo lives in a house. The dark lives in the basement. 

One night, the dark comes upstairs to Laszlo's room, and Laszlo goes down to the basement.

This is the story of how Laszlo stops being afraid of the dark."

- from GoodReads, too good a description not to steal. I loved this short, short book.

 This is a fabulous historical fiction book about Magulu, a nine-year-old girl who is sold into slavery. On the ship, there's a rebellion, the ship is captured, and all who participated in the mutiny are brought to trial. Magulu and the other children are brought in as witnesses. Its a wonderful account of pain, hope, and triumph. 

This is my favorite. Don't let the cover fool you, it's a wonderful book about conflict resolution and friendship. Adorbs.

Flu Books & Mostly I Talk About Jennifer Lawrence

I missed last week! And I was doing so well :( The problem, fortunately, was not for lack of having books to talk about, but rather that I was having too much fun reading the books to tell you about them. But sharing is caring, so I suppose I will briefly catch you up.

First off, I got the flu and didn't have the energy to hold up a book so I marathon listened to The Hunger Games again because I have a problem and apparently like to surround myself with suffering while I'm sick. I don't think it actually made me feel better, but at least I was entertained. Then I finished and had to turn to some new books, but I was only half awake through a lot of them, so I don't really have opinions on them apart from "I knew what was going on, and I loved them [the characters] because they were my only friends." Because I was too sick to talk to people, not because that's actually true. I hope.

(5 stars) This is my new favorite thing in the universe. You think I read a lot? Nope. Language Arts teacher Donalyn Miller is the teacher I wish I had. She develops this crazy system where she teaches kids to read by actually letting them read. WHAT? I know! How will they become better readers by reading every day? How does that even work?

While reading it, I was in the process of applying to grad school for teaching and it made me feel like I could actually do this thing I want to do, and that Donalyn's classroom would be my dream classroom. But, I also want to teach math. I wonder if there's a book called the Math Whisperer I could read next.
Anyway, cross your fingers for grad school! Read this if you're a teacher or want to help your kiddo learn to read, or if you're such a nerd you like to read about reading.

Now, Donalyn is a bit of a militant reader. When a kid comes to school saying "teacher! I read all through Thanksgiving and barely talked to my family!" (or something along those lines) And while this is something I absolutely did as a child, I don't think it's actually something you should recommend children do...maybe suggest they actually talk to their family? I donno, just a thought.

After reading this book, I am now trying to read a nonfiction book for ten minutes a day. So far it's actually kind of terrible because it makes me think too much late at night which does not make me want to sleep. Perhaps I can learn to wake up and read. But I can barely wake up to go to rehearsal, which is what I live for, so don't hold your breath.

(4 stars?) I really can't talk about this book without spoiling it. Mostly because I don't remember anything except for the end because I had a fever of 101 still. I might have even been up to 102 if that was my post-Hunger Games phase.

Basically it's about two different women in foster care, one in the 1920s, which was just about as horrible as you imagine it was, and the other today. The modern girl is not as bad as White Oleander, which traumatized me in 9th grade. (I read that and The Bell Jar and wrote a lot of bad poetry. I was the coolest.)

It's kind of cheesy. It's also kind of sad. I didn't feel super emotionally invested in the characters but I was just shy of hallucinating so...anything's possible really. Maybe this book is brilliant and I was just too sick to know any better.

(5 stars) This book was so good you guys. You should definitely go read it immediately. My only problem with this book was that I listened to the audiobook and the narrator did not have Jennifer Lawrence's sassypants dialogue down very well. Which is my problem with every book where JLaw's in the movie.

I'm going to steal the GoodRead's description, which I can only assume is on the back of the book because it's much better than anything I could write.

"Meet Pat. Pat has a theory: his life is a movie produced by God. And his God-given mission is to become physically fit and emotionally literate, whereupon God will ensure a happy ending for him -- the return of his estranged wife Nikki. (It might not come as a surprise to learn that Pat has spent time in a mental health facility.) The problem is, Pat's now home, and everything feels off. No one will talk to him about Nikki; his beloved Philadelphia Eagles keep losing; he's being pursued by the deeply odd Tiffany; his new therapist seems to recommend adultery as a form of therapy. Plus, he's being hunted by Kenny G!"

Emotionally literate. That is beautiful. This book is beautiful, and funny, and just....stop reading this and go read it.

Don't try and watch the movie two days after you finish the book. That is a bad idea. It doesn't matter how brilliant the entire cast is (especially JLaw, who won an Oscar for the role), you will fall asleep. Or I did. It was also midnight. I make good decisions.

Please tell me you're all as obsessed with Jennifer Lawrence as I am. 

The Perks of Being a Wallflower (5), Stephen Chbosky

Charlie is a freshman. A geek. The kind of guy that doesn't really fit in and mostly just talks to his English teacher and reads books. That is, until seniors Patrick and Sam begin to hang out with him and introduce him to the world of smoking, drinking, and The Rocky Horror Picture Show.

This book was beautiful. I'd heard for years that I should read it and it just stayed packed away on my list of books, getting skipped over for non-YA while I was being a pretentious snob. Then I realized that there are earth-moving YA books and you are still allowed to read them when you become an adult, crazy right?

Anyway, this book is beautiful. It reminds you of the messiness of life and doesn't try and wrap it up in shiny paper and make it all ok, but let's you wallow in the shared misery of being a human. It gives you hope that it's all wonderfully worth it.

The other thing I love about it is that Charlie reads a whole bunch of really good books, which makes me want to go out and read a bunch of really good books.

Charlie's Reading List

To Kill a Mockingbird, Harper Lee

The Great Gatsby, F. Scott Fitzgerald

The Catcher in the Rye, J.D. Salinger

The Fountainhead, Ayn Rand

This Side of Paradise, F. Scott Fitzgerald

On the Road, Jack Kerouac

A Separate Peace, John Knowles

Walden, Henry David Thoreau

Naked Lunch, William S. Burroughs

Peter Pan, J.M. Barrie

Hamlet, William Shakespeare

L'Etranger, Albert Camus

The Mayor of Castro Street, Randy Shilts

Selected poems, E. E. Cummings